Fourteen

3am prank callers should be thrown off the edge of the planet. Can't go back to sleep. Why do they do it? What fuels them? And you know what the saddest part is? They're not just calling to be juvenile assholes, they’re actually calling to hook up, as if any sane human being would find some random stranger who wakes them at 3am sexy/hot/desirable/worth the air they breathe, or that they'd be so plain desperate that they'd be willing to give it a try.

Prank callers. …Can I even call this breed of douchebag that? A few months back I made the mistake of answering the phone a couple of times (each time from a different number) thinking it was an emergency. My one groggy "Hello?" and abrupt ending of the call hooked them for months after. I've got at least five numbers on my contact list saved under "Shit1", "Shit2", "Shit3" etc, that still call at various times of the day and week. It takes a lot of patience and perseverance to keep calling someone who ignores your calls for months.   

Makes no sense.

3:56am. Have to be up for work in two hours. So tired.